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This is so short it's hardly worth posting and it's totally crack. It popped into my head and that fact alone scares me. I tried to ignore it but it wouldn't go away.
“I want it back,” demanded John over his radio.
Rodney answered breathlessly, “Busy.”
“I want it back, Rodney.”
There was no answer, only heavy panting sounds before John heard Rodney gasping. “Oh oh fuck.”
John rolled his eyes and let the breathing in his ear return to some semblance of normal before asking, “Are you done?’
Several seconds passed. “Yes,” answers Rodney, languidly. “I thought you were sleeping.”
“I was. Then I woke up and my dick was gone. I want it back.”
“You know you have an unnatural attachment to it,” huffed Rodney. John could hear the rustle of sheets.
“At the moment I don’t have any attachment to it.”
“You weren’t using it,” insisted Rodney.
John took a deep breath, counting to ten. “And I want it back clean.”
“Fine.”
“Fine.”